Thursday, April 24, 2014

Prior to beginning my random discourse, I fully anticipate you will probably think, She has way too much time on her hands. Actually not! But, since writing is my livelihood on several levels, I carve out a few minutes each day to try and make sense of this upset apple cart called Life.
The "W" word...Widow. I hate that word and the circumstances that lead me to even ponder it! The very sound of it conjures up negative images of dark clad dowagers, embittered Naomi's, and the worst image of all, me, past my prime, used up, pitiful.
I search for a better name to coin myself, but Webster and Oxford fail me. The Old English root, widewe, means be emptied; Yes, that's me, along with shattered and lost. I realize the legal eagles need a word to conduct the business of the lost. True, I'm neither single nor married, though I still feel very married. My inclination... strike the widow status and rename it parted!  Oh how I wish we weren't parted. 
Mrs. Rob Moore...Thank you, Emily Post, for not robbing me of that title, one that informs my world that our love never ends.
Like every other pain in this difficult journey, I must address this one as well before it consumes me. I suppose I will always bristle a bit when faced with this uncomfortable moniker, but the discovery of an obscure definition gives me great pause and forces me to reconsider my hatred.  According to the Collins English Dictionary, the last definition for widow is "to deprive of something valuable or desirable." 
Rob Moore...valuable beyond words!  
I must reshape my image of this word, embracing it as a tribute to a wonderful man with whom I had the privilege of sharing many years of happiness. I need to give this common pejorative a makeover, in word and example. 

Widow declares we were madly in love...he's gone...I'm deprived of someone so desirable and treasured that I live with great pain and emptiness, but...before the world stands a woman who saw love to the end, who devoted her life to her man in sickness and health and who now chooses to seek and share joy until they reunite.  Widowhood: the courageous battle of taking up where two were planted, keeping her beloved alive in the hearts of others, and entrusting her legacy, their legacy, to her great God. 

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