Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Bluebonnets, babies, and brothels

Healing happens when I least expect it. During my two weeks in beautiful California, I couldn't get the bluebonnets out of my mind. Rob and I always took a day each spring to explore the back roads of our Texas Hill Country. Our siblings, Brad and Nancy, joined us for our last trip together last April and I shall ever be grateful for wonderful memories. 

Part of leaning into grief is traveling familiar roads alone; I knew I must make this annual pilgrimage once again.
Little did I know that the dam would break with the first explosion of color, Rob's favorite, bluebonnets mixed with Indian paintbrush. Grief spilled in violent sobs, my pain sounded more like the braying of nearby donkeys.  I could hear his urging, "Don't miss those over there...Are you looking?" He knew me well as I was probably fiddling with my camera settings. "Where we gonna eat today? BBQ? A piece of pie?" Each sweet memory pressed a little harder, tears flooded the trip to Austin, but once there I knew I was one step closer to whole. Exhausted...yes, but stronger, the burden lighter...
I enjoyed the babies like I had not been able for months. Pure joy cuddling with Mattie and playing with Stephen. I felt like a grandmother again!

The weekend with the kids ended in the most surprising way. With boys down for a nap after all of our outings, Stephany and Alex began to share their hearts over recent needs in their ministry, Little Changes International. I had just informed God that I had no idea when or where my next ministry step would lie and He would have to drop it in my lap. I hoped with all my heart that God would use my passion for ending human trafficking. 
They began to share about a Home of Hope, a transition home for 6 young girls rescued from the same Cambodian brothels that startled me into action several years ago.  They needed my help with this new project, 6 girls needed my help, God had dropped the need into my lap! Another step in healing...investing in the healing of the least of these.
The wildflowers were even brighter on the way home. So was my heart and the future of six beautiful girls...

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