Mondays with Jesus-wave watching

 This past week, I took my eyes off Jesus more times than I wish to admit; I shifted my focus to the waves of our tumultuous world. I left my position at the feet of Jesus, trading wonder and peace for angst. I didn’t deliberately decide to go wave-watching; I simply caught a glimpse of the chaos and chose to linger awhile.  Forgetting to run back, I lost my view of the King of the Universe who holds all things together. Wave-watching is mesmerizing, addictive, captivating; before I knew it, my posture was completely off kilter. Silly things were irritating me and important matters loomed large; my flesh was winning the battle. I had left my joy at the feet of sovereign, compassionate, patient Jesus to watch waves I could not control. I did not drown, but I was waterlogged with sarcasm, judgement, fear. This morning, this  imperfect vessel is again planted right back in front of the only One who pours life into her. It’s a lovely gaze!

Mondays with Jesus-Plans

 “I had my life planned out,” she shared; I don’t think I heard another word after that. So did I!

 I never planned to divide life by b.c. and a.c; before cancer/after cancer. We had cared for parents and grandparents with the dreaded diagnosis, but our family regrouped and returned to our life as we had known it. 

Cancer was a season, not a lifetime companion. Gene mutations lived in a remote lab, not in my closest people. Scans were annual annoyances, not riddled with anxiety and IV’s were for blood donations, not life-sucking chemo infusions. A June 2013 diagnosis of pancreatic cancer changed everything and then, came breast cancer. 

What is your before and after? Divorce, miscarriage, addiction, a career loss?   How do you make a meaningful life amidst broken plans? I’ve been sitting with Jeremiah and the exiles in chapter 29 this week; every time I read it something new jumps off the page. For example, the Message translation includes a clause in verse 11: God promises, “I know what I’m doing.  I have it all planned out.”  His after holds great promise; it’s your starting point, your foundation!

And this grabbed me: plant something new. Stop trying to make the shards of a past life sprout and start growing something new and beautiful. Plant a new relationship, a talent, something! Nourish it with love and hope and watch what God does. Read it for yourself; you’ll find inspiration. 

This past weekend I met Doris, a brain cancer warrior, in Lynn Eib’s book, When God & Cancer Meet. This is how she loved her a.c. 

life:  Are you convinced that neither chemo nor radiation, neither scans nor surgery, neither good news, nor bad news, neither predictions nor unanswered prayers, nor anything else in all the world of cancer, will be able to separate you from the love of God that is yours in Christ Jesus? 

Now, you fill in your own after and let’s both rest in His love and better plan.

Mondays with Jesus-A Place at the Table

The fall semester has begun and I’ve settled into a rhythm. Quiet Mondays after a hectic weekend and before a challenging midweek. If the Lord calls me to write, I suspect it will be a collection of thoughts that may not necessarily string together in a polished fashion, but a patch of thoughts that will guide my week.  Monday musings….

One of my favorite things to do is to find an obscure book at a secondhand store. I usually ask God if He has something in mind for me before I begin my fun search. Last week, I found a thin book nestled between some heavy theology works: When God and Cancer Meet by Lynn Eib, a pastor’s wife and oncology counselor. She shares some poignant stories of her work with former patients; this one hit home! She writes of Lyle, a Leukemia patient, and his return to God. One of his quotes shook me: “I can’t believe I left the body of Christ.” Sit with that for a moment. It’s huge!

My parents left church after a conflict over tithing; by the grace of God,  I found Jesus on the first day of my junior year through a little tract being passed out by Young Life. But I missed out on the life-changing experience in my early years. I have dear family and friends who too have left the body of Christ (that term sounds a lot more personal than church, doesn’t it?) I’m undone thinking of the remorse they might feel if their wake-up call comes late in life. Oh, Father, bring them back soon to the deep joy of meeting You in a fellowship, a body, of others seeking to know You more. This is my urgent prayer!

That brings me to my second reflection for this week: Jesus really does invite everyone to his Table. That includes the poor in spirit….those of us that recognize our heart’s poverty and dependence on God.  In October, my church is offering a “Gathering in the Gym” on Sunday mornings. I can’t wait to see who Jesus has invited to his new table of worship, restoration, and life in Him. I truly believe this will be one of his finest fruits from our recent season of revival. 

I’m reminded of these old hymn lyrics: earnestly, tenderly, Jesus is calling…Come Home!

Change of Plans

 I like having a plan and sticking to it.  Since I’ve been praying this small but powerful prayer each morning, I’ve had to relinquish my plans a lot! “More of You, LORD, less of me.” 

I spent a grueling month preparing to teach the CARS section of the MCAT to a student. I had devised a solid plan to teach her how to “fish”  for correct cues instead of just memorizing the passages and corresponding answers. In short, I was let go.  Fast forward to last night….a couple from her country of birth appeared in class. One month in the States and no English! What? MCAT to the very basics? “More of Me, less of you, Robin” It was so fun and I have new friends, strangers to our culture. My plan was thrown out; Jesus was very present. 

On the same night, I was rushing to prayer meeting, my favorite hour of the week, and a friend stopped me. She needed help and prayer straight away.  I did not make it to the chapel; God had planned a “when two” gathering right there on the sidewalk. 

I had a predetermined plan for the evening; God had a better one. I was reminded that church is not always a physical place to assemble and serve, but a sacred space where the Holy Spirit collectively lives among His believers….He wants to move.

Stay Close

 

I relocated my bird feeder yesterday. It was hanging from a shepherd’s hook away from the tree and had become an easy landing pad for the big birds. The doves had moved in, hoarding the real estate, and the former residents were visiting less  often….only a quick snack and run. What a beautiful surprise after hanging it in my Crepe Myrtle; the smaller birds began feasting, nestled among the branches. My little friends seemed happier and more comfortable sitting on their perches.

It got me to thinking; what made the difference? Perhaps, they were now  in their natural habitat. Maybe, because they were no longer in the wide open, they felt connected to something more familiar. That’s not all; before long the tree was teeming with birds. They were flocking to the branches, waiting to be fed. 

A lot like us, don’t you think? When we find our resting place, we relax a little better. It feels familiar, like we were always meant to come home. Every time we connect with our perfect Vine, we linger a little longer because we know He’s going to spread a feast before us. Jesus is going to prune us and we’ll begin to bear a new crop of good fruit. We feel safe, cared for and you know what? We, too, begin to flock; Jesus has time to rub off on us as we abide in Him; He begins to shine through us and others just want a taste!

Remain in me, as I also remain in you. John 25:4